July 2011

July 2011, the laziness strikes me and hit so very hard..

Today

May 5 2011, Thursday. 10:44am

I just finished merienda here at cubicle in alternative fuels division at Department of Energy Philippines. (working as an intern)

I'm wondering again and again, and I think this habit won't stop until death.
I noticed that my wiring are negative or misery oriented. I often notice people's mistake around me, their bad habits, their negativity, every wrong doing I can't help but to see. I don't know, maybe I'm just thinking that I'm better than anyone else around me. Ahh so paranoid..

I'm on facebook, and I'm visiting the site almost regularly. The site's intent was nice in my opinion, to connect people, to keep in-touch. Long lost friends see each others, always have news to what happens, ideas on what people talk about. It's nice, But it doesn't appear that way as I see it. Every time I log-in, If not a boastful status message, misfortune statuses are there, or sometimes you'll notice a friend who have no status, as if he/she don't care, but he/she is online... I don't know, maybe I'm just thinking that i'm better than anyone else around me...
Imagine the world now, friends will never get no contact to each other as long as there's facebook, or internet. Everyone is connected.

chirp chrp chirp chirp chrip- birds
errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr- aircon
blah blah blah blah blah- co workers
clink klingk klenk - keys
plak plek plak - papers
if symptoms persists consult your doctor- radio
pak pak pak pak - steps
click click click
tok tok tok tok - mouse, keyboard
criinnng criiiing- phone

whatelse , plates on glass top table...
rolling wheels

Hello Mate

I took a review on my notes, journals, drafts, scribbles, etc.

I therefore conclude that, I am not the same person who wrote such things.
Whoever he is, hes gone. dead, replaced, transformed, transcend, evolved, whatever.

I consider this place as sanctuary. A refugee.
A direct window to right hemisphere of my brain which is managed by my left.
They cannot oppose each, for it will cause destruction. Hence, it supports each other in harmony.

Ney

sorry.......
sorry for being insensitive
sorry for being dumb
sorry for not meeting your expectations
sorry for being cold
sorry for all sorry for everything
but sometimes, i feel sorry not at all
sorry for being rude
sorry when misunderstood
sorry for loving you
sorry for being selfish
sorry I am jealous
sorry for the disappointments I had made
sorry for making you mad
but I am somewhat glad, in someway I made it in your heart
sorry no more for me
sorry no more, now she totally left me
sorry is what I say, for hours into days, I hope I won't mourn all the way
I love you, yes I do.
but my definitions aren't sure, nothing matches you

yellow whole grains rich in carbs sometimes pop sometimes in cob, usually boiled.
eaten then enjoyed... ^^ mais

Despair

The wrath of the Gods has struck me again.
Everyday was a shame

stupid....

I fucked myself... what can I say....

the world is full of stupidity, look at everyone, what you will see is stupidity.

don't lie to your self.. asshole....

i was on this fuckin website, the so famous facebook.com... ok what did i see, humans full of fucking stupidity... everything is just a plain stupidity. everyone wants to show that they are happy from their pictures to status. .. if not, they brag about something else like their loses and shits. .. .. of course it's stupid, it shows limitless foolishness of the humanity.. everyone had chosen to play the fucking game of this life.. this is shit...


of course in the end i'll realize that i'm wrong..

the hell i care.. of course humans are stupid... they cause their own sorrow, from the first day we are born, a human is a stupid being, a fool, don't know anything but to cry, and continuously seeking comfort... comforts that sooner or later ends... but still wan't to move on because there is nothing we know.... WHY AM I FUCKING HERE BITCH????? to continue the legacy???? the legacy of the fucking stupidity??? what the fuck... AND what are the other things I can choose? to fucking end this life?? to die to kill myself?? what the hell!!! why would i want to live? or why would i want to die??? thats bullshit.. this world is fuckin insane, we can't be here for something... something what? something my ass... if we are supposedly have any purpose? what could it be? to fucking study? and work, marry, fuck, then die? . . . .. . if there is something you call paradise, then another bullshit, why not live there now.... everything is wrong, and by just your fucking reasoning, you can fool your self and make it right... fuck you human... of course i'm a human also.. still fuck you human... dam shame..


fuck it man... love fuck glory honor shit money attention fame, whats the sense of all of these?... i see people that wants comfort, in a manner that it wouldn't produce any sort of pain. by giving love, charity, support, or any sort of good. some do this by fighting the fucking cause of this suffering by becoming impatient, it's like fighting fire with fire... either way both are shits.. once you move on to the next level of course your current state wouil definitely change, and your not the same anymore of course... then what? stupidity.. you'll continuously use your reasoning, your head your mind,, what ever you call it, in what reason? to reason out what just happened... and then what? stupid fucking asshole. fear, doubt, uncertainty,.. to counter such what we call negativity, we fool ourselves by reasoning out.... by knowing the cause, and find a solution... why? to be happy... then after being happy? after the change? now what? it's either you are sad or neutral... this case, you're not happy anymore... then what? of course nothing is certain.... how about death? the hell would i know... the hell did anyone know about death... fuck them

shuei

all you have to do is to know the rules of the game and play it better than anyone else.... simple as it is.... understand what is there than assuming that it is what you expect.


bastard.. remember this, ignorance excuses no one... there are certain laws in every place that you need to respect... whether you are a good person or not, once you jump from the top of a building, you'll surely hit the ground..
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

this are just things that i learned from my day to day living, by reading other blogs, knowing famous persons like einstein, seeking answers on the questions that runs in my head, and so on... It's true right? that there is no harm you can get by repeating a good thing.. and that originality is just remembering what others say or did, and forgetting that others name....

ya.. and it is really true that an intelligent fool can make simple things complicated and complex